How Many Times Do I Have To Say This?!?!?

A few months back I was in DC for some hill visits with new-ish advocates. And they were tired. Dog tired.

Going to DC is no joke. It takes a toll on you. Like any business travel, it throws off your system. Your sleep, your diet, your energy – it’s all off. But when you’re there to fight like hell for your cause, the pressure doubles at least. And you get worn down sneakily fast.

That’s where we were. These good folks who were fresh-faced only hours earlier were ready to throw in the towel – but we still had 3 or 4 more meetings to go! If I had a nickel for every time I’ve seen the looks on their faces spread across all the advocates I’ve worked alongside.

But this time, the real exasperation just spilled out of one guy on the trip. After what seemed like his 17th time working through his portion of a meeting, he pulled me aside in the hall and just asked what so many want to ask: how many times do I have to say this?

I just wish I’d had a better answer for him.

In the moment I just told him to dig deep. I reminded him that we only had a few more to get through and then we’d get a celebratory bourbon so he could put it all behind him. It was enough in the moment. But I’m afraid I sold the guy short.

It’s never just 3 or 4 more times. Never. In almost every issue area, our politics moves at a glacial pace. Through immense effort, we move the needle just ever so slightly. Then we have to figure out how to move it again, and again, and again. Just to get a little bit of momentum. To far too many of us, that’s just an unbearable prospect. It really does separate those who do from those who won’t.

The reality on the ground is that you’ll have to do your part 10,000 times.

Okay, that may be an exaggeration. But the number of reps you’ll put in for your cause will astound you in the end. And in many cases, you’ll still not arrive at a final “win” on your issue. It’s a dilemma I didn’t fully appreciate it when I was on the other side of the table as a young congressional staffer. I didn’t quite come to terms with how many times you have to be willing to have the door closed in your face to make a difference.

That’s exactly why we must stop thinking in the terms of winning and losing. You don’t win politics. You may win a debate. You may win a vote. But there’s always the next rung to climb, the next barrier to overcome, the next door to open. The game is infinite.

This week, I want to challenge you to think about your issue in a different way. I want you to ask yourself: “how many times am I willing to say this?” Be honest with yourself. Is this an issue that’s going to keep you excited when it’s your 437th time telling a personal story? Are you really motivated to show up – even when no one else does?

Because that’s the real answer. The truth is you’ll have to share it all, over and over again. You’ll have to teach that new staffer everything you taught the last one. You’ll have to choose the times to forget what’s happened in the past and show up to face a longtime opponent with the pluck of a happy warrior. You’ll have to sweat through your suit on an early summer day in DC again. And you’ll have to unlock whatever it is that helps you keep showing up.

So stop asking yourself how many times you have to do it. That ultimately couldn’t matter less. Instead, challenge yourself to think about how many times you’re willing to do it. Don’t hide from the answer. You may just realize that the issue really is worth all that to you.